Why Do We Argue and Fight?

What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? James 4:1


fight 2

Why do we quarrel? Why do we fight one another? Not only does James raise the question, he also answers it. He goes right to the heart of the matter.

Most of the time the problem isn’t with the other person, it is with us. As James writes, because we strongly desire something which we do not have, we are willing to murder someone for it. Maybe not physically, but like Jesus said, even if we hate someone, we have committed murder in our hearts.

Or if there is something we covet and believe we deserve, but are having difficulty in obtaining it, what do we do?  Don’t we end up quarreling and fighting over it. We may even steal it.

Even when we pray and ask God for what we desire, why do we become angry with Him because He doesn’t grant us our desire? Over time we learn that He knows what is best for us. As we learn over time, trust takes time to build between two parties. And God knows what it will take to build a stronger relationship between Him and you. Another reason James gives  why God may not grant us the matter is because we want to spend it on our passions. Again, God doesn’t want us to behave like the ungodly but to learn how God lives.

Generally speaking, James is saying our heart is not in agreement with God’s. We allow pride to lead rather than humility. We are double-minded. Our hearts and head and hands are not focused on building our relationship with our heavenly Father. Instead we seek to gratify our inner desires rather than focus on the good for others. So what is James’ recommendation?

To draw near and submit ourselves to God.

When our focus becomes aligned with God’s Will, Purpose, and Plans, we are not so easily tempted by the world’s passions. Instead we seek to strengthen the relationship with the God of the Universe – The Father-Son-Spirit that owns everything and has created everything so Jesus Christ may lead the family Business for now and into eternity. Through the Holy Spirit that opens our eyes to see the ways of God, we learn how we may best serve others, God, and ourselves without our passions controlling us. Eventually, God even blesses us with our old desires when they no longer are more important than the relationship we have with HIM.

Rooting For You in Christ!

Dr. Mike

Executive Director & Founder
Marketplace Bible Institute
& Resource Center, Inc
Author of e-Books:
 *  Great Business Emulates a Good God
 *  Be Radical…Follow Christ!
 *  Simply The Messenger
 *  Unequally Married

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