Grief

It Hurts

Dr. Mike 2026 , , ,

 “Rejoice, young man, during your childhood, and let your heart be pleasant during the days of young manhood. And follow the impulses of your heart and the desires of your eyes. Yet know that God will bring you to judgment for all these things. So, remove sorrow from your heart and keep pain away from your body, because childhood and the prime of life are fleeting.” Ecclesiastes 11:9-10 NASB

Everyone will experience hurt in their lifetime. Most hurts will heal. Some will not. All hurts though will leave an imprint in our life. In some ways we are the sum total of our hurts.

These hurts come from an endless source of darts thrown in our direction. Most often from an unlimited pile of human ignorance. Some hurts are the reflection of expectations gone wrong. Others are the damage left by people deliberately or unintentionally provoking you.

Whatever the source, the result is the same. It hurts. 

We may bring hurt upon ourselves by a sinful act. We may think we are doing good when the end result is harm to another.

We hurt when the grade needed from a class falls short and we lose out on a scholarship for college.

We hurt when the person we have a crush on tells us they are not interested.

We hurt when the bills are more than the money in the checking account.

We hurt from the outcome of an auto accident.

We hurt when someone close to us suffers from a tragedy.

We hurt when we wake up the next day with a hangover from yesterday’s party.

We hurt when our close friend reveals a hidden secret to others.

We hurt when our spouse tells us they do not love us any longer and wants to go their separate way.

We hurt when rejected from the job we enjoy.

We hurt when our love ones die.

We hurt when our bodies no longer quickly recover from the workout that day realizing age is catching up to us.

The issue is not the hurt. But how we respond to it. The hurt may last a lifetime. Or only a few minutes. But the fuller we grieve; the faster we forgive others and ourselves; the healthier we become with another learned lesson toward maturity in Christ.

God wants us to dream dreams and pursue them. He wants us to chase the desires of our heart. But HE also wants us to do so within the boundaries of HIS character. Being hurt is the price of becoming more like Christ.

An athlete chooses temporary pain to grow their muscles. They push themselves until it hurts. Then they back away. They want to be the best they can be. So, hurt is part of their process.

As Christ-followers, we likewise learn to integrate faith into every area of our life. That includes our dreams and desires. We thus pursue our goals partnering with Jesus. We ask HIM to be involved in our daily walk. We offer our dreams to HIM. We ask and seek out HIS ways in the process. But we are careful our dreams are always secondary to our relationship with HIM.

Yes, in the Christian journey many darts of hurt will come our way. The pain will be real. It will hurt. But as we lean on Jesus, HE will walk with us in the pain. HE will help heal the hurt or carry us through the pain. We will learn from the situation. We will mature in the process. We will learn to trust HIM more. And always, you can be assured, HE will continue to root for you, and help you, even while it hurts.   

Rooting For You in Christ!

Dr. Mike

Faith-Integrator, Encourager, Scribbler

“We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,” (Colossians 1:9)

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Grief is Unbridled Love

Dr. Mike 2023 , , , ,

Psalm 31:9, 24

Be gracious to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eye is wasted from grief; my soul and my body also… Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the Lord!

Grief is love with no place to go are words recently spoken to me via a sermon. At first, I was unsure of the concept, than it sank in.

We are emotional beings wired to express love outward toward others. When the aim of our love disappears and is no longer available, our heart cries. The emotional and psychological loss of being unable to release the heartfelt love we desire to share with another is overly painful. Our sense of security and helplessness in a dangerous world is shattered. We find ourselves struggling with upsetting thoughts and anxiety that won’t go away.

In this Psalm, King David is lamenting over the iniquity of his adultery with Bathsheba and the murder of her then husband Uriah. This has now evolved where his son Absalom’s is leading a national rebellion against him and the nation. Though God has forgiven him for this past sin, the consequences of these actions have caused some irreversible problems in his life. He is now facing the chastening period grieving and pleading for God’s mercy and intervention.

At this time, many of his friends have abandoned and left him alone. He was on his own without the support necessary to deal with the matter. So he fled and vacated Jerusalem.

As he prayed, bearing his soul, the psychological pain of someone he loves becoming his enemy unleashes within him. The inner battle between protecting the nation and caring for his embattled son has caused great fear  and anxiety to overcome him. Yet he moves down the same path as always been his habit. He cries out for help from his Lord.

The end result, David fled, and Absalom entered the city to become King of Israel. Absalom’s reign was short though as he was eventually killed. Then David returned as king of the nation. Yet through the entire ordeal, David grieved over the loss of his son and the chastening brought about by his miscues.

Grief hurts. When you are unable to directly express the love you have for another, it hurts. When you accept the responsibility of a poor choice which harmfully impacts the lives of others who you truly love, it hurts.

Yet we have a merciful high priest in Jesus, who personally understands the human condition. HE relates and intervenes for our good and the good of others who are caught up within our world of choices. Like David closing remarks in Psalm 31, our role is to exercise courage in trusting our Lord.

Jesus has promised never to leave us nor forsake us. As we lean on HIM, HE will fill our cup, sit us at the table, and soothe us through the painful, grieving process which is necessary to heal the body and soul. HE is the reason when we lose someone we love and cherish, our hearts turn to HIM. HE is always there to accept our love and perfectly respond to the situation.

Love unbridled. When grief overtakes us, we are fortunate to hug Jesus and allow His strength, compassion, and care hold us through the process.

Rooting For You in Christ!

Dr. Mike

Faith-Integrator, Encourager, Scribbler

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