Sexuality Trap

Hebrews 13:4

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

Yes, God created sex. Not only did HE create the biological male and female, but also the physical and emotional pleasure and enjoyment of the act. Like everything else HE designed, sex also has a purpose within HIS plan. Now God is not prudish but understands human behavior and emotion since HE purposely designed us with the sexual desire in place.

Now many of us in the 21st century erroneously believe freedom means choosing and doing whatever we desire. Yes, freedom gives you the option to choose whatever you desire, but each choice also has consequences. A choice that leads you to your destruction stills allows you to exercise your freedom, but the end result may remove any further freedom you possess.

The Bible instructs us how sex without Godly boundaries leads to a self-imposed dark hole. But on the other hand, sex with healthy boundaries leads to freedom of expression, intimacy, and fulfillment. Our human mind often finds difficulty in understanding this concept between freedom and boundaries especially when it involves our personal satisfaction.

For example, God’s desire is to have a personal relationship with you. He has provided the means, historical evidence, and reward system to make us aware of HIS intentions. Yet, many choose to refrain from sharing life with HIM. He created the human procreation method for more people to have the opportunity to invest life with HIM. HE even designed sexual intimacy between a man and woman as an example of the love HE wants to share with each of us.

The Hebrew Bible over 900 times refers to this intimacy as Yada – intimately knowing. The Bible in Genesis uses this phrase when a couple are having sexual relations as Adam yada Eve. In Psalms, King David expresses this phrase multiple times as being in a state of yada with God. Yada typically expresses the covenant bond between two parties. This covenant bond is found within a Biblical Christian marriage. The marriage commitment between a man and woman creates the safe space for two people to experience the yada relationship between each other and the relationship God has for us.

The sexuality trap is separating God from sex. When God is left out of the relationship, so are the morals and boundaries of human expression. The trap is sprung when sex becomes a commodity only to satisfy one’s desire rather than an intimate time to share oneself authentically with another. When the sex act becomes an addiction of pleasing one’s emotional cravings, one has sold themselves to the slavery of sin. One has lost the freedom found in true love and buried themselves into the pornographic virtual world of make believe. Again, when one becomes chained in the prison of sin, their best hope is found in the grace of God and HIS teachings on eternal values.

God’s covenant love expressed through HIS relationship with the people of Israel and HIS church set’s us the important example of the sexual encounter. Through the sexual act we come to intimately know someone. God’s covenant with HIS people is HIM giving 100% of HIMSELF in relationship with us so we can come to know HIM better. Not 50%-50%; not 80%-20%, but 100%. HE is constantly giving 100% of HIMSELF into the relationship.

Many of us humans operate within marriage from a contractual viewpoint. If the other side doesn’t fulfill their part of the contract, we believe it gives us an out. So, we divorce and move on to the next relationship to repeat the process over again. But God’s covenant agreement is not contractual, but one sided. In a successful marriage, each side is giving 100% of themselves to the other.

God created us as sexual beings so we can have a taste of HIS desire for us. HE yearns for us to come and know HIM – to yada HIM as HE yada us. Likewise, our human sexual desire imitates HIS desire for us. To freely share the sexual experience solely with another person committed to the relationship until death do us part leads to coming to know more who God IS and HIS love for us.

Having multiple sexual encounters is like worshiping multiple gods. When you choose the one Triune God and only worship HIM, you embarked on an adventurous, joyous journey. However, when you chase after false idols, you experience the frustration and disappointment of never finding your one true love. 

Enjoying sex outside the committed relationship of marriage is falling into the trap of slavery to sin. Sin is living outside of God’s created order of real harmony where true freedom, flourishment, and fulfillment is found. Real abundant living includes a healthy expression of sexuality between two people in a committed relationship for life. There they learn and experience the joyous meaning of Yada.

The God-ordained institution of marriage when fully understood and practiced according to the covenant principal of yada leads to real freedom, flourishment, and fulfillment. The results are good for couples, children, and society as a whole. But when sex is extracted outside of marriage, and God is removed from the relationship, sex becomes a discounted-store commodity. What was designed for two people to experience life to the fullest becomes an uncontrollable addiction leading to pain and misery in the long-term.

This is why the writer of Hebrews emphasized that the marriage relationship is a higher honor and value than just having sexual encounters with uncommitted bedfellows. Don’t be fooled by the lies and traps of culture. Learn what God recommends. You will be pleasantly at awe by the outcome.


Rooting For You in Christ!

Dr. Mike

Encourager & Author of e-Books 

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Money. Sex. Power.

Colossians 3:5

Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.

I am surrounded by a culture predominately immerse with money, sex, and power. Whether it’s portrayed in the movies, on the internet, or social media, I am constantly shaking my head asking myself how did we as a nation get here.

Why does this world seem to take what is good, wholesome, and beneficial for mankind and rampantly exploit their features? Like the sugar addict who can’t get enough, we as a people take what God has created for our good and dismantled it into a commodity. We buy and sell money, sex, and power because we can and we don’t even consider the downside and the pain and misery we produce along the way. All we care is we get our share and the hell with anyone else. At least that is how I have come to witness the culture being thrown in my face without my approval.

When the apostle Paul wrote his letter to the Colossians church, God’s people were likewise dealing with similar worldly vices. In his letter, he emphasized that we do not control the world around us but we are responsible for our own personal behavior. And personally, we are instructed to kill our carnal desires.

Whenever any desire for a goal, commodity, or experience supersedes our desire for a more intimate relationship with the Triune God, trouble naturally follows. Throughout human history, most of us humans never seem to get enough money, sex or power. At least, my unscientific study seems to indicate that these are the three most abused desires; when run rampant, they leave a trail of destruction. We want more and more and more, but yet are never satisfied. Lives are shattered, families destroyed, and eventually nations crumble.

This is why a relationship with the Triune God is necessary. For you and I are wired to become one with HIM. When the Triune God is allowed to fully express HIS life in you and me, then HIS divine nature which includes self-control is a force to subdue our inner carnal desires. HE also gives us the knowledge through the Bible of what is good, but that alone is not enough. Mankind needs HIS Spirit living in us to fully control the dark side of human nature. And even then, we may occasionally fail, but HE in HIS divine grace, has already forgiven and restored us in Christ Jesus. We are included with Jesus in the Triune circle of life.

We don’t have to partake in this world’s culture of in-your-face excessiveness. Instead, we can quietly and humbly walk with our God, allow HIS Spirit to direct us toward living an abundant life full of real love, joy, and peace which the world truly wants but has no understanding of how to make it happen. Yes, you can even enjoy money, sex, and power bridled under the domain of God’s heart. Because after you had a taste of real life with HIM, you than come to know how to effectively manage and measure real satisfaction and fulfillment in your world.

Rooting For You in Christ!

Dr. Mike

Encourager & Author of e-Books

 *  Dancing With God: Life-Giving Theology Explained
 *  Great Business Emulates a Good God
 *  Be Radical…Follow Christ!
 *  Simply The Messenger
 *  Unequally Married

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